I feel Lighter

Now I need you to bear with me for a second.

There is one thing I have never understood and hopefully you guys can put me out of my misery. Snow White ate a poisoned apple and fell into a coma right!!!!!. Then prince charming from another land came and kissed her and voila she was awake. My question is,,,, What was that prince doing in that particular forest(or part of it).?

To me he sounds like a “perv”… I mean what are the odds that:
1.The first time he strolled through some random forest he finds a prinsess in a glass cofin?
2. He happens to be “THE” prince that wakes her up?

I am sure everyday he went riding through forest after forest looking for a princess. I know he tried sleeping beauty but could not get through the thorns. Rapunzel was not feeling him so she did not throw down her hair and the other princess,,,,,,,,,,,,,, well we all know she chose a frog!!! He was a desperate prince and Snow White just happend to be laying there so he took a chance. And what do you know…… He woke her up!!.

I know you are wondering: Why ooh why is she talking about this? Truth be told It’s because I was thinking about it just around the time I woke up from surgery. I thought that was going to be an AHA! moment. That I had finally figured it out but I hadn’t(so please help me out)

It’s such a weird feeling when half of your body is numb. This is  where I take a moment to thank the person who invented the Ephidural(I know,,, I know,,, I was hating on them before but a girl is allowed to change her mind,  isn’t she?) That’s how they administered the morphine so a shout out to that person.
Oooooooooohhhhh the person who came up with morphine! He/she  deserves the Nobel prize. I will not Judge them. I won’t(I mean common what where you cooking up for you to end up with a drug that makes the body feel no pain at all?????)

By the time I was waking up from my Snow White dilemma my little brother was there. The hospital had called him once I had been wheeled back to my room.. I was a bit off sorts but hey I had just gone through surgery and the morphine was on point!!

There is something very humbling about staying in the hospital after certain procedures. You can’t shower so the nurses(male or female) have to clean you up and pweeeeze don’t get me started about toilet visits.!!!!! The first 2 days after surgery I could not walk to the rest room because of the morphine that was being administered through my back and also because I just couldn’t walk.

My surgery was on a Monday and on Thursday afternoon they took me off the morphine. The pain hit me like a storm. I remember hanging out of my bed because I had no idea what to do with myself.

I was now able to move a little so I decided to take a well deserved shower. After the shower I got back to bed. This  young little nurse (not running a mock on nurses but she was really young and little) that had come to give me my pain medicines asked me on a scale of 1 to 10 how high the pain was. I told her a whooping 9. She then said “oohh that high? Usually when pain is that high you can’t even move let alone go take a shower”.

Eschuuuuuuse me Miss I  know pain!!!

Ooohhh I wanted to hurt her. I wanted her to experience pain. But I would end up in prison and I can’t go for long without having my nails done. So for the sake of my nails I told her that she should just hand me my pain meds because only I knew the level of pain my body was experiencing. Besides she was young, she deserved to live a little.

I was supposed to be discharged on a Friday but my body was in distress and certain body parts were not functioning properly. I was cramping and the pain was insane. I could not,,,,,,welll eeuuhhmmm,,,,, pass……….. (seriously fill in the blanks. Colon cancer,,, soooo…….)

Monday morning my pending issues(see what I just did there?) had not been solved but that was not reason enough to keep me admitted. I was discharged and told to call if the situation did not improve.

Bye bye hospital bed and best of all, bye bye hospital food. Hospital dinners had turned me into a food critic. I am an amateur when it comes to cooking. Despite that I know and appreciate good food. Hospital cusine is not good food but I’m not complaining even though I had my people bring me homemade food.

I was in alot of pain and could not stand upright. The staples were not helping matters. But I was home. Jehovah had seen me through what will turn out to be the first part of my journey.  A few days later the staples were out and I felt lighter.

The tumour was out of my body plus a sizeable chunk of my big intestine. I must say that I felt lighter(was still hoping for thinner).

Physically I was in pain but emotionally and mentally:

I felt lighter